Sunday, August 03, 2008

Family,Office and Love. (Blogisode1)

 (All characters in this post are imaginary.)
'What is this, Ram? I need to talk to you regarding some serious issue’, Ravikumar said to Ramkumar with an angry tone.
‘What matter?’ asked Ramkumar.
Ramkumar was Ravikumar’s only son .Ravikumar (will be called Ravi from on) and Shyamala were very proud of their son Ramkumar.He was the biggest asset to them. Ram was their only hope to the family. Ravi and Shyamala had laid all hopes on him and were hopeful that he will take care of his sister Archana.Ram was turning 26 and his parents had some different plan.
‘Dad! What happened?’ questioned Ram.
‘I am getting late for office. Shall we talk later dad.’ smiled Ramkumar.
‘Sure son, but do come home early ‘Ravi said addressing his son.
‘Fine Appa, I will try’ said Ram.
‘bye Appa, bye Amma ‘Ram left.
‘Shyamala, can you get me a cup of coffee, dear?’ Ravi asked his wife, with Hindustan Times on his hand.
‘Seri (ok)’ Shyama went to kitchen to make coffee.
Meanwhile Ravi was reading Hindustan times.
The Kumar’s lived in a small town near Coimbatore .They were Orthodox Brahmins from Pallakad.Ravikumar was working in Customs .Few years ago, he took voluntary retirement for his son’s education. He took his VRS when he was left with 10 years of his service.
‘Take your coffee ‘Shyama placed the coffee cup on the table.
‘Umm, the coffee is sweet just like my sweet wife’ Ravi said taking a sip.
‘Archana is here and you should know that she is a grown up kid now’ said Shyama.
‘Shyama, you make me feel old .Who would say that I am a father of 2 children’ winked Ravi.
Archana was Ravi’s   daughter and she was doing her 12th class from Sri Kalyan College of Science near Coimbatore. As usual she was once again late for her lecture and was late for her Zoology class. Shyama was having a casual chat with her husband regarding their son.
‘Amma!!’ Archana shouted for once.
‘Where is my lunch box’ Archana shouted at her mother with an angry tone.
‘Take your lunch box and do come home early’ Shyama said to Archana with a straight face.
‘Seri Maa (ok mom)’
‘Bye Appa’ Archana hurried.

18 comments:

  1. That was cute!Is there more? :)

    Happy Friendship Day!

    P.S. A small error I noticed in Ravi's dialogue towards the end.Shouldn't it be "...father of 2 children" ?

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  2. @ mampi

    fir ....well still more to come yaar

    its just the beginning

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  3. @ sameera

    y for rectifying the error

    changed it

    any way still more to come

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  4. @ trinaa

    its a short story friend

    may be atleast 6 episodes minimum

    will update it soon

    waiting for saturday

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  5. ....Im glad I knew Kumar's family.... I'm preparing to see what will happen into his house for the next some episodes....

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  6. hey...good to see that an episode series is springing up. Hmmmm...the introductions part done..i expect the plot to takeover now....cant comment much because only the introductions have been done till now...waiting for the right flow...maybe a bomb in the tiffin box...hmmm..he he!! one suggestion...keep the length of the post a lil long while posting episodes..maybe u can retain more interest had you given a peek into the plot...mere introductions is a cardinal sin...

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  7. also devise a twist in every episode before ending it...a "bye appa" is not enough retaining material....an "Ohhh!!", Archana screamed...would have forced me to keep my fingers crossed...thats what i can best comment here bro...i know u will come up better in the next episodes..cheers!

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  8. hehe thank u sandeep for ur valuable suggestions

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  9. yes olimpia tune in here...for futher episodes

    i promise that it wont be like my fourth seat ......

    wont disappoint u readers

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  10. interesting start..
    seems to be pretty inviting!!
    :)

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  11. Good beginning...
    Well what have you named your story?
    Whatever it was, it was neatly expressed and i could visualise whatver you had scribbled.
    Bookmarked ur blog.
    and i m surely gonna read the other parts ver soon.

    I am also trying my hand to write a small novel on my blog v.CoL
    Could you please read it and comment on it.(coz' i think since u write so well u can be a good critic too)

    Shiva


    CrAzYbLoG
    v.CoL

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  12. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  13. hmm leme read more and comment..

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  14. @ asbah

    hey do comment yaar wud like to hear it from u

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