Saturday, April 09, 2016

Bestiality is illegal

Bestiality is illegal

Andy and Mandy met each other after almost 3 months.  They both were best of friends. They hugged each other tight when they encountered each other face to face. 
"Hey brother," Andy started.
"Mandy man, long time, I am so happy to see you again." He smiled at his best friend.
"So what's up these days? Anything new happening?" Andy asked him.
"I'm having an affair with a chick," Mandy announced.
"Brother, are you serious?" Andy asked.
"Yes man," Mandy confirmed.
"But dude, Bestiality is illegal." Andy laughed.

Mandy stood there perplexed for few minutes. Two minutes later he understood his point.
"Okay, my mistake. I am having an affair with a gorgeous woman," he said and continued, "Damsel, princess, hottie and whatever you want to call it." 
"But still Bestiality is illegal," Andy said and poked fun at him.
And as usual, Mandy got irked and vexed.

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Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Choo Mantra Kaali!

Choo Mantra Kaali!

Mandy claims to be a magician in front of his friend who is a gorgeous girl. He wants to impress her so he comes with a new trick. His friend  asks him to prove that he is a magician and he tries to do something.

Mandy: Sweetheart ,I will make you vanish.
Gorgeous girl : Oh really!
Mandy : Choo mantra Kaali! Vanish!
Mandy :Choo mantra kaali, vanish, you beauty !
The girl displays a frown.
Mandy:(closes his eyes) Choo mantra kaali! Gorgeousness coupled with awesomeness go disappear.
She  gets pissed off and leaves the place
Mandy:(opens his eyes) oh she vanished. I  am a magician hahaha

Saturday, February 25, 2012

Andy-Mandy & Anna



Andy & Mandy have been quite busy lately and finally they have time to meet each other at a famous Lounge in Delhi.

Andy - Hey buddy, long time...it feels good to meet you again.
Mandy-Same here buddy.
Andy - I had a chance to meet Anna last week.
Mandy- Even I'd met Anna last month..
Andy - Such a wonderful person and Anna has large followers.
Mandy - Followers? I thought they were fans.
Andy - May be you could say so... Anna is indeed very intelligent and smart.
Mandy - Very true...a very great fun loving  person....
Andy - I admire Anna...
Mandy- Yes I love and I want to marry Anna someday...
Andy - What...You want to marry Anna Hazare?? [Shocked]
Mandy- Err...Were you not talking about Anna Kournikova?

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Friday, November 25, 2011

Andy -Mandy : Mandy & Fastrack bag

 

Finally after several years of experience, Mandy had become the Vice President of his company and he was asked to present a session on Creativity & Innovation to senior managers of leading MNC's.Andy was Mandy's PA.This was exclusively for IT companies.

Mandy - So guys welcome to the club. So how does it feels being big guns.I mean senior managers.

All- It feels awesome (in unison).


Mandy- You all are here from different organizations and today I  have been asked  to talk on Creativity & Innovations.
All - Wow! you are the  man!

Mandy - I know. I am going to find your organization with the help of your bagpacks.

Everyone looks at each others face.Andy laughs like anything and he is sure that Mandy would  goof up.

Mandy cleverly  notices the company logos and names written on each of their bags.

Mandy - Mr A (with Amdocs bag) ,you work for Amdocs right?

A - yes Sir.

Mandy - Mr. B (with Persistent bag ), you work from Persistent right?

B - oh Wow you are awesome.

Mandy - Mr. C (with AT&T bag ) , you work for AT&T right?

C - Mandy ,you are a genius man,...you are absolutely right

Mandy - Mr. D (with Fastrack bag ), you work for Fastrack right?

Andy is watching all the fun.

D - Are you nuts man,... If  I have Fastrack bag..does it means i work for Fastrack. I work for Google man.

Every one starts laughing and Mandy watches at everyone with a straight face :D



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Thursday, October 20, 2011

Andy-Mandy: Mandy & the Doctor


Andy - Doctor, is my friend fine?
Doctor - Whats the problem with him Mr Andy?
Andy - Well doc ,he behaves strangely and weirdly in public places and eventually gets beaten up by people.
Doctor - Oh sad ! Let me check him.
Mandy - Hello Docyy

Doctor - Hi Mandy. Tell me what is this ? (shows certain things to him )

Mandy - Stupid .. its a doll.
Doctor - yes..perfect.. Now tell me what is this?
Mandy - Idiot..don't you know how a pen looks like.
Doctor - Amazing..Now I'm sure you might not be knowing this
Mandy - Oh God!! this is what generally people use when they have sex.
Doctor - Wow..you are simple incredible.. and now tell me who am I ?
Mandy - Ummm...hey wait..you are the Ramu the monkey which escaped from the zoo right.Let me call the zoo authorities right now...
Doctor - Whaat...are you crazy (runs away )
Mandy - hey don't run man...come back...runs behind the doctor


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Monday, August 29, 2011

Andy-Mandy: Ladki & Sala



 Andy and Mandy roam  in a shopping mall and Andy comes across someone. Andy goes to a beautiful girl who was standing with a smart boy.

Andy - (to the girl)Hey Sweety ,how are you? Love you loads baby . (hugs the girl) 
Andy - (to the guy)Abey Sale , kya haal hai ...yeha kya  kar rahe ho tum do..

Mandy was watching all this.Sometimes he would get jealous because of Andy's charm. He was skilled at making friends. Mandy thought if Andy could do that then why can't he. He soon spotted another  girl standing with a guy.He  rushed there

Mandy - (to guy) Abey Sale, kya haal hai ...kya kar raha hai...
Mandy - (to girl) Hey Sweety,how are you? Love you loads baby (hugs the girl)

(The girl slaps Mandy)
Girl- How dare you call me Sweety and baby?. Who are you? 
Girl - (to the guy next to her) AG Sunte ho...isne mujhe baby kaha...
Guy - (Slaps Mandy and Punches him ) How dare you call my wife by such names?
(A mob gathers and  everyone starts beating Mandy. Andy comes to his rescue and freeds him)
Andy - Bhai tune us ladki se batameezi kyun ki.
Mandy - (holding his swollen cheeks)Bhai , I did the same what you did to the other girl and the guy next to her.
Andy - Idiot...she is my fiance and that guy is my future  brother in law.

Mandy faints.
 
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Saturday, August 27, 2011

Andy-Mandy : Woh TERI hai!



 Andy - Abey tu Idhar kya kar raha hai ?

Mandy - Nahi yar, i am just waiting for a friend

Andy - Jyada smart mat ban...I know tu kiski wait kar raha hai...

Mandy - Bhai...she is  mine...woh  MERI hai..

Andy - Meine kabh bola be  woh MERI hai..... Haan Woh TERI hai.

Mandy - Bhai,are you serious? ..

Andy - Haan bhai voh sahi mei TERI hai..

Mandy - Love you bhai...you are my best friend... thanks woh MERI hai..

Andy -  haan bhai .. woh TERI hai..kitne baar bolu... abh blog likhu kya uspe.
Mandy - Thanks bhai.. i cant  believe you are telling that woh MERI hai..

Andy - Haan bhai woh TERI hai .... TERI BHABI :P


Mandy faints....
 
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Thursday, August 25, 2011

Andy-Mandy : Woh MERI hai!!!




Andy: Abey Mandy, idhar kya kar raha hai be tu?

Mandy: nahi yar... bas waiting for a friend.

Andy:  I know..jyadaa smart mat ban...I know everything ...tu kiski wait kar raha hai...voh MERI hai

Mandy:you again started brother....har ladki teri  hai...abh yeh wali  MERI hai.

Andy:  Nahi Mandy .. mei  innocent girls ki zindagi barbaad nahi hone dunga..   woh MERI hai..

Mandy:  Look whoz talking..

Meanwhile the girl walks in ......

Andy : Achha hua you came dear ... tum MERI ho naa...

Mandy: abey dear ke bachhe.... tell me tum MERI ho naa

Girl:  haan Mei toh Mary hi hun...Mera naam bhi nahi yaad hai tum dono ko ( Slaps Andy and Mandy  and walks away)

Mandy: (with his hand  over his left swollen cheeek)  Bhai... yeh MARY na MERI ho saki ya TERI 

Andy: ( Looks at Mandy with his hands over his right swollen cheek) .



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Monday, August 22, 2011

Andy-Mandy : Friendship Band


Disclaimer - Andy and Mandy are two imaginary Characters. I present you the comic series. Will post it once every week. Let me know how is it


Pre Script
Andy is writing his "ADBMS" assignment and Mandy comes running

Mandy:Oye Andy !! Check this friendship band that Priyanka tied on my wrist.
Andy: Its beautiful and lovely brother.....nice nice.
*Andy continues with the assignment work.
*Mandy stares at the band
Andy: Mandy,why are you staring at the band like mad ?
Mandy: Nahi Andy,I wonder why is this circular colourful bead is embedded to the middle of the band?
Andy:Bhai ,do you still believe that this is a friendship band ( laughs).
Mandy: Nahi ,Yeh nahi ho sakta ...... mein kisi ka bhai nahi huuun



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