Monday, January 11, 2016

Live in the Present, Not Future

hugging family
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It was 5 on the clock and the appraisal letters had not yet arrived. It was the talk of the day as we all had anticipated the hike letter.  I was quite sure that the HR's mailbox would have been jammed with too many emails from the employees asking questions about the letter. I was foreseeing  a good hike this year   and had already made plans. Shoba, my wife had sacrificed her last few years for our twins.  Her own family disowned her as she considered me important than her family. Being from different castes, our parents didn't agreed to our marriage. She eloped with me at a time when she needed her family support the most. May be she trusted me a lot. She couldn't even continue with her education. Her folks declared  that they would not see or talk to Shoba again.   I had promised my sons Abhishek and Abhijit that I would take them to Disneyland this year.  I wanted to surprise my family.  The rented house that we were living in was not too good.  The Home loan gulped large portion of my Salary. Even  both my  boys were growing up and school fees these days are expensive.

"Ashutosh!" Monica, my  junior called me and I came out of my reverie.
"Guys, Check mail ASAP," Ankita Singhal from the Database team announced and we all launched the HR IDEAS Portal at the same time. 
"Shit ya! 4%!" Shriya said with a straight face. 
"Fuck! 2%,  Fucking peanuts," Gotham muttered.

My heart started pumping rapidly after seeing their initial reactions.  The Portal was still getting loaded. As the progress bar of the browser moved forward, I had my heart in my mouth. I was getting anxious with every passing minute. Finally, the web page opened. I clicked on the "Show my ratings" Link and I stood stunned. 
"B  - You meet your expectations!" I read.  I calculated and found that  an annual hike of 3 % was awarded to me.  I closed the browser and left for the  Tapri. I took a puff of the cigarette and got lost in my own train of thoughts.  I soon left for my Bay. That day I was disappointed with my appraisal hike. I just couldn't stop thinking about it. Everyone seemed depressed. 
I soon locked my desktop and left for the parking.  I inserted the key into  the ignition and started my Splendour. The security guard saluted me as I neared the gate. It was then I realized that I had forgotten my helmet on my desk.  I  gave him a pleasant smile and moved ahead.

As I was riding the bike,  several thoughts gripped my mind. My mind was invaded by negativity. What about Shoba? What about my twins? What about their education? What about my promise to them? What about the Home Loan?  I just couldn't focus on driving. 
I missed the signal and  rammed onto a Truck.  It wasn't the truck drivers fault. I lay drenched on a pool of blood.  My body lay there on a state of stasis as I felt my soul departing from my body. A mob  thronged into the scene and encircled me. My skull got ruptured  and I observed my bleeding brain.  People were talking amongst themselves. Few of the college going kids were shooting videos with their mobile phones. Police arrived in few minutes. They drew a chalk outline of my body and send my body to the Sion Hospital for a formal necropsy.  The Officials contacted my employer and  my wife Shoba through  the information available on my Office Identity Card.  

I was watching everything from sidelines. Shoba and my boys rushed to the Sion hospital. Tears streamed down her cheeks.  Abhishek and Abhijit were sobbing. I wanted to go down and embrace three of them. My entire team comprising of my Delivery Manager, Project Manager, my juniors and my close friends were present at the Hospital. My boss was providing solace to Shoba.  But tears just couldn't stop flowing from her eyes.  She hugged both my boys and sat in one corner in disbelief.  At that moment, I felt that I shouldn't have fret about the future. Days passed and Shoba and kids were asked to vacate the rented house by the Landlord. She pleaded and asked for time but the arrogant rascal refused to budge. I stayed close to three of them, watching every single action of theirs. I used to be the only source of income of the family. She was helpless. Initially, my organization and my team helped her but such kind of help are only subjected to a limited period of time.  If her parents hadn't disowned her she could have lived with them. But Shoba was a rebel. She could fend for herself and raise our kids. She started working in a house as a maid and my boys discontinued their education as they couldn't afford to pay more fees.  Her mistress  used to harass her.  I just couldn't face all that. 
After a long day at work, she sat down on the floor with the kids sleeping on her lap. I sat next to her. I saw the pain on her eyes. I  always loved her smile.  It was one of the most riveting parts of her body. She looked at my photograph and tears started rolling down her cheeks. 
"Shobha, don't cry!" I asked her not to cry. I just wanted to hug her tight. 
"Shoba, Please don't cry," I said but she ignored me. Maybe she would be ignoring me forever. But I would   mind dying once again to let her know how much I loved her. I so wanted to hug her one more time but that time would never come again.
She deserved a life of a  Queen and we would have happily lived  in our own little Kingdom. I wish I hadn't thought about our future. "Oh God! Save my family and give Strength to Shoba!"  I prayed to God. 
At the same time, I saw Shoba mixing the Rat poison to the food. 
"Shoba! Don't do that for God sake!" I screamed. But sadly all that I screamed or cried could be heard by none
"God save them...God, please stop her. " I screamed at the top of my voice. 
But by then  they all had consumed the food. 
"Shobaaaaa.........." I screeched. The incessant honks from the vehicles behind got me out of the dream. The Traffic Signal showed 3 seconds left. 

"Bhosidike! aage  jaa naa." An auto driver yelled at me.
I moved ahead and thanked Almighty that it was a dream. Dreams could be scary at times and they could tell you everything about your future. I lost my  family in that dream and even saw their sufferings. 

I stopped my bike near a Tapri and washed my face. 
"Never, ever,  Never... I will think about my future," I promised to myself.
My family needs me and I am their support structure.
"I will be there for them forever!" I said and started my bike.
After I reached our home, I hugged and kissed three of them. 
"I love you guys. You are my life!" I hugged them tight,  so tight that no one could separate us.

Dear Friends,
We all should understand that  our family and our loved ones matter the most to us.  It's our responsibility to support them and show that we care for them through our every words and action. Show that you love them! Live the moment! Don't worry or think too much about your future. It will hurt you and eventually hurt your family. 
Live the moment. 
Take Care

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Real Togetherness - Let's Simplify Life!

Real Togetherness
Image Source 
Gone are the days when we used to sit together and discuss how life brought in some amazing changes. The participants used to be our children, parents, or our close friends. I admit that those days used to be the best days of our life when gadgets and internet were still in the process of construction. But after the advancement of technology it seems like we all have turned slave to the fiend called technology. Smartphones, The internet, Electronic Gadgets have made life miserable leading to many lifestyle diseases that have vowed to shorten our lifespan. 

In this process, we somehow have forgotten to realize that we have a life outside our virtual world. Life isn't about writing on each others wall on Facebook, Tweeting on our profiles, Pinging on chat messengers, Checking in at specific locations online or Posting our Selfies and amazing photographs on various photo sharing apps. By doing this, we may acquire the status of a mini internet celebrity but what are we getting by doing that is the big question? Put aside the tech savvy  within you  and return back to the period  before technology came into our lives. Why not take some time and make some meaningful discussions with our family and friends.  We could talk our loved ones at the mall or a shopping complex for shopping instead of clicking random buttons on an app to get our products delivered on our door. Let's simplify life! 

Uncomplicating life is the need of the hour. I have come across parents who don't have time to give quality time  to their children. We should give moments and memories to our loved ones. Through technology, we are distancing ourselves from them.  It's time to break down the shackles of the Digital world and  connect with each other in person. Plan a trip outside for a day or two. Enjoy Quality time with your family and friends. Reminisce the good old days with your friends. Narrate your childhood tales with your children. Let them know that your life was amazing as theirs! Always remember that it's the little things in life that make life beautiful. Stress and Lifestyle diseases will eventually haunt you some day if you run behind things that only give you momentary happiness. By this, I imply the money minded nature of us! Set priorities in life and spend time with family and friends. Go and discover the real togetherness by spending time with them. Take them for trekking and spend time with nature and unleash the lost love! Rekindle the true happiness of your life. Life is short and moreover it's precious. You can't just afford to mess up with it. Remember True happiness lies in Real Togetherness and it can be acquired by spending time with our loved ones and Nature can help us in some or the other way.  It's high time to build a meaningful bond with our kith and kin in the real world. 

Do Visit this link to Discover real togetherness ->

Sunday, August 09, 2009

149.Understanding Family & Love..

149.Understanding Family & Love..

Family and Love don't necessarily go vis-a-vis .I mean both are completely different.A Family is associated with you since the day you stepped on to this world.Likewise Love is something that you get during later stages of life,but I'm sure that it cannot be compared to your family. I've been highlighting the importance of your family many times when I write such posts.Because your family is the one who serves as your support structure.Here I want to distinguish family and Love.When you fall in love with someone,you don't tend to inform your family members.Trust me since I am from India my observation may not be the same.My Indian buddies have shared many such facts with me and I've my closed friends too.Thus there might be a case where your family might come to know about your secret.This might at times turn into a disaster.Well most of my Americans and European friends here may find this strange .This is because Indian culture is different and here importance is given to family and culture.Over the period of time this attitude has changed.Thanks to Western influence.

A family is a place where you find like minded people who support and encourage you.They motivate you and provide you with all that you need at an early age.Parents play a pivotal role in this so called "life" of yours.I have my mom whom I treat as my best friend.I confess all my secrets to her and share things happening around me.This is because she trusts me.Allparents trust their beloved kids.I've been highlighting this trust factor since few days.Trust is something in which the person believes your honesty and reliability.How would you tend to hurt your parents by breaking their trust on you.This disappointment would naturally cause side effects in form of health hazards. In this para we've been talking about family.If you love your family,then you won't hurt them.Similarly you can't hurt someone who loves you.Here I am not talking about your family.He/She believes you.For some reasons ,I feel that I've been inducing things which are meant for Indians.Excuse me.Let me relate this with a real life example.I had this friend called E(name changed).E was known for his genuine characteristics.He helped people and he was imbued with great qualities.His parents were proud of him for the same reason.My mom would always ask me to treat him as an idol.Even I used to be proud of him as I knew him since childhood.
His parents never cared for him.By this I mean that they just don't sit and talk to him.So he used to feel isolated sometimes.Recently he got a new person in his life.He was dating her for past 1 year.His parents came to know this and were sad.There is no point in getting sad at this point.Because it is late and you don't know what to do at this point of time.Right approach would be to sit and talk.Talking and Sharing views can bring some solutions.Parents should keep a track on their childrens activities.Not doing this would cause unlikely events.

You love your family as well as your special one.Butsometimes what will happen if your family knows about your Miss/Mr Special.Worst case scenario would be that they would dump her.Why would you wait for all such things to happen?Why don't you tell your parents before hand ? This can be advantageous for you and you will not have the fear of losing your special one.At sometime when you spill the bean at the last minutes ,then wait and watch for the effects. Thus I would prefer informing your family about this.In some families,siblings serve as a pillar in bonding such relationship when parents fail.This won't happens everytime.It is an exception.I sometimes find my observations funny.Family and your love life is like a see saw.There should be some balance between the two.On other hand some sort of Equillibrium must be maintained between family and love.Both are directly proportional to each other.This may be contradictory to what I wrote at the first line. If there is no equillibrium between the two, then at some stage you will arrive at a point where you have to sacrifice one.Both are important part of our life and we won't wish to dump any of these . Thus ,the perfect solution would be to talk to both of them. Make them understand everything.Arrive at a solution.It is like a WIN WIN case.Make sure that both the parties are happy. Many love stories have come to an end abruptly because of lack of support from family.Also many times love has bloomed because of support from family .Be happy and Live life at the fullest. This is the only way to remain happy and gay(I mean Merry ,not the other gay ) :P

PS:Wrote this for a blog community called bloggersbase

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Thanks Dad ,for all that you have done for me

Thanks   Dad ,for all that you have done for me
I'm sending this note especially for you Dad,

because you're the best Dad I could have had.

Thanks for teaching me right from wrong,

And what it really means to be strong.

You taught me its all right to make a mistake,

and to always be honest and never be fake.

You taught to value every life,

and that harsh words lead to strife.

Thanks for all the sacrifices you made for me,

And for teaching me that love is the key.

Thank you for showing me how to pray,

and that it is something I should do every day.

I am grateful for all you did to encourage me,

Without your help, I don't know where, I would be.

(I would like to dedicate this post to my father ,who has done a lot to my sister and me and how would I forget my mom ...... thanks mom and thanx dad for all you have done for me and Anu)